DADDY ISSUES
dear inner child,
i’m sorry you didn’t have a father in your life. no man. to hold you, carry you, kiss your forehead. no man. to see you, listen to you, care for you. when you were climbing trees, when you learned how to ride a bike, when you made a drawing. no man. to acknowledge you, cheer you up, support you. when you felt sad, when you did something brave, when you said something smart.
no man. to love your mama either. to help her out, tell her she was pretty. to cook for her, massage her feet, light a fire and make her a cup of tea after a long day of work. to tell her not to worry. no man. to exchange thoughts and help her set boundaries.
your daddy wasn’t around and it created this unbalance in you. you still received plenty of love. you weren’t unhappy. but there was something missing. in your core. in your foundations.
now that doesn’t mean that you didn’t deserve this paternal love. it doesn’t mean that you weren’t smart, pretty, good at drawing or climbing trees. there simply was no man to see you while you were doing all those things. no man. to give you validation, love and recognition. it’s not fair but that’s just how it is little one. it is your story. it is what made you you.
and since then you’ve been looking for this missing part of you. in all men’s eyes. trying to see yourself through them. to get their attention, tenderness, admiration.
but you know what darling, there is no man who can go back in time and erase your wound. no man. who can fill up the space left by this absence. stop looking. look for peace instead. start healing your deepest tissues. and keep drawing and climbing trees. keep being you little one. cause you’re so damn good at it.
